End.

..salam..

with just one picture, one sentence and one thing happened, i had a lot of reasons to give up on you. enough. i am not waiting anymore. i'm so tired of pretending everything is okay. mr.A, let me break your heart and see if you're still okay.

how come you have enough time to make other girls fall in love with you but you don't have any time to pay attention to the one who already is. maybe i'm just a replacement for what you can't have before. thinking about someone else and wanting to be with someone else is enough to end our relationship. you treated me like an option so i left you like a choice.

the reason i don't talk to you anymore is because i keep telling myself that if you wanted to speak to me you would. i never gave up on us. you just stopped caring so i stopped trying  and i moved on.

i listened to all your lies. i trusted you and you just let me down. i hope you're happy. i always seem to fall for those sweet words. that's my biggest mistake. what i don't understand is how a person can tell me so many lies and never feel bad about it. i should have known you would just break my heart. i don't hate you. i'm just disappointed you turned into everything you said you'd never be.

but then, i'm glad i did meet you. cause you were the one who stayed up late just to talk about the random things. the one who i told secrets to. the one who cared. thank you for making me laugh. i hope one day you're going to wake up and notice that you should've tried for me. but that's impossible.

i'm letting go. you let go a long time ago and i realize that it is time for me to do the same. at least i've tried and i won't regret anything. when we meet one day, before is over. before cannot ever come back. we're in the present now, where we pretend that 'us' had never even existed.

i'm sorry i was not the one for you. you deserve to be with somebody who makes you happy. somebody who doesn't complicate your life. somebody who can give everything you want. even if we can't be together in the end, i'm glad that you were a part of my life. let us follow our own paths.

may your days be filled with happiness.

may happiness be mine too.

BYE.

 

 p/s:

i have made mistakes to someone else. but i wish that just for one day you could stand in my shoes. then you will understand why i did that. i will never ask anything anymore. Sorry and Thanks for everything.

konon jiwang

..salam..

rindu lah. setelah berabad lamanya tak menjenguk, tiba-tiba hari ini mamai nak menulis blog. actually nak cerita tentang percutian bersama keluarga sebelum ini. tetapi saya bukan dalam mood senyum sekarang. dah kenapa nak ber-mood-mood pula kn. maaf mengada.

teringat kisah tentang dia1, dia2 dan dia3. lagu Hazama - Relakan Jiwa didengar. lagu Fiq - Setia Hujung Nyawa meniti dibibir. bila terjadi sesuatu dan pernah rasa menunggu lagu Nomad - Tetap menanti pula dihafal. apapun lagu Afgan - Jodoh pasti bertemu itu menarik. chewahh. :p

kita fikir tentang dia sampai susah hati tapi dia okey seperti biasa. kita sedih fikir banyak perkara yang tak menyakinkan, tetapi dia anggap itu perkara kecil. kecewa kan? okey itu sakit. tapi sedar, saya juga salah. maaf diucap untuk semua. juga terima kasih untuk segala.

diri tengah buntu dengan apa yang sepatutnya dibuat. nak off nanti sesal pula nak on hati agak penat. tapi sayang. kena fikir betul-betul dahulu. pliss hati jadi lebih yakin dan kuat dengan segala apa keputusan yang dibuat. memang solat istikharah lah jalan terbaik kan. moga diberi petunjuk.

sudah lama meninggalkan kisah sebegini. tetapi menyapa sekali lagi. ya rasa gembira. tetapi bahagia juga dicari. kalau saya cuba tak buat hal, harap dia juga cuba tak buat hal. mungkin dia mencuba. okey thanks. kata kawan, itu ujian. terpulang kepada kami untuk selamatkan atau tamatkan.

jangan bertindak terburu-buru, bincang terlebih dahulu, jangan kusutkan hati dan minda, perubahan akan berlaku kelak. itu kata orang. hurm, keliru. bukan tak mahu yakin. mahu. mahu senang hati bersama. apapun Allah sudah tetapkan segalanya. yang penting senyum dan doakan yang terbaik. :)

dua quotes hari ini:

ini silap saya,

seharusnya saya,

A secret

People still talk about it.

It's eating me up inside.

"Once exposed, a secret loses all its power."

Telling someone feels like peeling off my own skin to expose everything underneath. It hurts.

"It was mistake" you said,

But the cruel thing was, it felt like the mistake was mine for trusting you.

"Forgiving does not erase the bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted memory."

Sure, I will forgive but take in mind I will never forget.